When dad struggles after baby is born

• Author: Medical disclaimer: This page is for educational and informational purposes only and may not be construed as medical advice. The information is not intended to replace medical advice offered by physicians.
• Published date: 22 June 2022
• Publication title: Napier Courier, The

Having mixed and complex emotions as an expectant or new dad is completely normal, but these can be confronting emotions to manage. Along with feelings of joy, excitement and pride, the experience of pregnancy and birth can be accompanied by feelings of apprehension, anxiety and exhaustion

Most people know that depression and anxiety during pregnancy and early parenthood can affect mothers, but it’s important to remember that partners are at risk as well. Depression affects one in 10 women during pregnancy, and one in six of all new mums. Depression affects one in 10 dads between the first trimester and the year after the baby’s birth.

The support they might need can be in relation to sleep deprivation, financial worries, a change in responsibilities or changes in relationship dynamics. For both parents, the arrival of a new baby brings with it enormous life changes and adjustments. Fathers may experience feelings of guilt knowing what their partner is going through, knowing that it is not him who is breastfeeding at 4am or recovering from labour and birth.

Symptoms of postnatal anxiety and depression can look different for each dad. These are some of the common signs and symptoms of anxiety and depression in expectant and new dads.

● Constant tiredness or exhaustion.

● High physical stress levels including headaches, muscle tension.

● Loss of interest in things you usually enjoy (eg, work, relationships, downtime).

● Appetite changes.

● Sleep problems (unrelated to baby’s sleep).

● Changes in sex drive and desire for intimacy.

● Irritability, anger, resentment, frustration, moodiness.

● Fear of looking after your baby, or avoiding caring for them.

● Feeling rejected by your partner as they focus on caring for baby.

● Emotional withdrawal from your partner, baby, family, friends.

● Not wanting to communicate with your loved ones.

● Feeling isolated and lonely.

● Using alcohol or drugs to “escape” or cope.

● Thoughts of self-harm or suicide.

If you’re not feeling yourself, it’s important to know that you don’t have to suck it up.Looking after yourself

● Talk to friends or workmates who’ve recently become parents. You’d be surprised how much more you have in common

● Be adaptive to new challenges. When you become a dad, a lot is going to change and you will run into new challenges on a daily basis. This is okay. No one is completely prepared for their first child and it’s normal to feel overwhelmed or confused at times. You aren’t expected to know...