Cemetery dispute remains unresolved

• Published date: 18 April 2024
• Author: Sarah Curtis
• Publication title: Northern Advocate, The (Whangarei, New Zealand)

Robert and Kim Donker’s only daughter Ella-Rose was killed at the age of 18 in a single-vehicle car crash caused by a drug-affected driver about 11pm on Saturday, June 10 last year

Since her death, Ella-Rose’s gravesite in Maunu Cemetery has been a special place for her family and friends to go, with many leaving tributes on her plot. The family also placed a small bench there.

However, the cemetery - owned and operated by Whangārei District Council - objects to tributes being left on the lawn space. Early last month, it asked the Donkers and other families who had similarly decorated their loved ones graves to remove the adornments.

The Donkers considered the request “heartless” and a dispute arose in which they voiced their upset to the Northern Advocate. They wanted more time to grieve before having to clear the tributes.

The cemetery’s manager Stephen Jenkins said he understood how extremely difficult such a request was for families still feeling the raw emotion of losing a loved one. However, the council wanted to preserve the intention of a lawn cemetery - a peaceful, green and uniform atmosphere, able to be maintained by staff in a discrete, almost invisible way, he said.

He “sincerely hoped” he and the families could find a way to resolve the matter.

Kim Donker, when contacted by the...