Final farewell to fiance, new dad

• Published date: 16 March 2023
• Publication title: Clutha Leader

Shawn McAvinue talks to Georgia Redshaw about her late fiance’s battle with cancer and his love for his family, work and tractors

Although she expects a clearing sale of a South Otago agricultural contracting firm to be ‘‘horrible’’, Georgia Redshaw plans to be there to honour the memory of her much-loved fiance, Joseph Cross.

Joseph ‘‘Moss’’ Cross died on September 12 last year, eight weeks after being diagnosed with cancer.

He was 36 years old.

His funeral was held soon after the couple celebrated the first birthday of their daughter Breeana.

Mr Cross felt a lump near his navel in July last year, Miss Redshaw said.

‘‘I couldn’t feel it but he could. He was feeling fine, he just thought he ate too much dinner at my mum’s.’’

Two days later, she called Clutha Health First in Balclutha and was told it was a probably a hernia and he could wait to be seen by a doctor weeks later.

After telling Clutha Health First she wanted a second opinion, she was told she would need to take him to the Dunedin Urgent Doctors.

‘‘The GP there was amazing. She said ‘it doesn’t feel good to me and you need to go the emergency department at Dunedin Hospital right now’ and we got rushed straight in.’’

On the same day, a doctor at Dunedin Hospital told them a CT scan had revealed he had a stomach cancer and it was terminal.

‘‘We came home and spent the weekend crying.’’

On the Monday, they were told the diagnosis had been changed to a treatable appendix cancer, pseudomyxoma peritonei.

However, in the week following the new diagnosis, his stomach started to ‘‘blow up’’ and get tight.

‘‘He was in so much pain.’’

Over the following weeks, he began vomiting and was admitted to Dunedin Hospital and given morphine.

The family was flown in an air ambulance to Hamilton, where doctors drained fluid from his stomach and surgery revealed he had a rare and aggressive cancer, signet ring cell carcinoma of the appendix, which was mutating.

A surgeon in Hamilton told Miss Redshaw that Mr Cross could expect to live for a week.

In the ward, she waited for Mr Cross to wake from the anaesthesia to tell him the ‘‘worst news ever’’.

‘‘He knew straight away.’’

The family was flown back to Dunedin Hospital days before his death.

More than 500 people attended his funeral at the South Otago Town & Country Club in Balclutha.

His coffin featured images of some of the fleet of tractors of his contracting business Cross Agriculture.

‘‘He is so nice, you could not meet someone nicer — I don’t think he had a...